Want to Excel in Life?

By Karen Kleinwort ~ 12/16/2011

This is such a loaded question and one that I continuously ask myself and my clients each time a challenge is presented. In doing some research I came across this great site by Monica A. Frank Ph.D. Dr. Frank is a sports psychologist who freely shares her wisdom and I wanted to share with you an article of hers that I think is filled with great information regarding goal setting.

Enjoy!

GUIDE TO HOW TO SET ACHIEVABLE GOALS

By Monica A. Frank, Ph.D.

Often people state "I'm just lazy" or "I'm unmotivated" when they are unsuccessful. Yet, most of the time, the problem isn't laziness, but lack of understanding about how to achieve goals. I believe that much of the problem the American people have with weight control is related to inability to set goals.

Oh, we can set goals alright! We can set them until the cows come home. But if we don't set goals properly we are unlikely to be successful. For instance, I hear people all the time "I'm going to lose 10 pounds in the next two weeks" or "I'm going to exercise an hour a day" or "I'm going to limit myself to 1200 calories a day" or some combination of these statements in attempts to manage weight. However, even though they might achieve these goals over the short-term, any long-term change is unlikely. They will revert to old habits with resignation sighing, "I'm unmotivated. I'll never be able to lose weight."

The same problem can occur in the work setting: "If only I could get organized, I would be more successful at work." Or in sports: "I just don't stick with things. I give up too easily." Again, the problem is likely to be problems with setting goals. We tend to set goals that are unreasonable, perfectionistic, and unachievable. You may question this statement, "What do you mean unachievable? I see people achieving these goals all the time." Which is true. However, most likely they achieved their goals by following some of the principles I discuss below.

First allow yourself to fully imagine what you would like to achieve. When you imagine your goal, try to imagine it as fully as possible. Allow yourself to picture what it would be like when you achieve it. What does it look like? What are the differences in your life? How will you feel? What will others see? In fact, write down what you imagine. If your goal is to start a business, imagine opening the door to your new business and looking around at what you see. If your goal is to perform well in a tournament, imagine your performance fully, what your body feels like, what you notice around you. Write these things down.

1) Realistic but challenging. However, even though this is your "dream" it needs to be within reason. For instance, it may be reasonable to lose weight and to feel healthier, but is it reasonable to "look like a supermodel?" Unless you already have the genetic makeup for it, you are setting yourself up for failure. Or, you might dream about developing your own business, but to expect that you should be as successful as Bill Gates within 10 years is unrealistic. Besides, from what I have read about Bill Gates, I don't think that is the sort of goal he set for himself. He focused upon the more immediate goal of developing a personal computer that was within the ability of most people to own. The business and financial success came later.

At the same time you want to make the goal challenging. If the goal is too ridiculously easy, it won't have any meaning for you. Beyond that, you may not even achieve too easy of a goal because there is no point in it. We need some challenge for us to be motivated, but the challenge can't overwhelm us, and thereby decrease ability to follow through. One mistake people frequently make when setting goals is to set too many goals at one time as a way of making the goal challenging. However, you want to be challenged by specific, manageable goals.

2) Performance goals rather than outcome goals. The most achievable goals are personal performance goals rather than outcome-oriented goals. A goal of winning a competition, for instance, is an outcome goal. One problem with an outcome-oriented goal is that we have less control over outcome than we do over performance. For instance, another competitor may have an outstanding day or you might be suffering from a virus that diminishes performance. In addition, sometimes there are outside factors that influence outcomes such as umpires or audience behavior.

Performance-oriented goals allow us to evaluate ourselves independently of these other factors. I know when I competed in martial arts, I had times when I thought I had just done my best performance in kata competition yet I didn't win, and other times I won when I thought it was a poorer performance. Therefore, I found I could maintain more consistency by evaluating myself independently of the outcome based on specific goals I set for my performance.

In the work setting, an outcome-oriented goal may be a goal of obtaining a promotion or increased salary whereas a performance-oriented goal may focus on specific activities to improve the work environment or productivity. The interesting thing about this type of goal is a person may be more likely to achieve the desired outcome as well. For instance, I once had a client who had not been promoted at work in years. He felt he did a good job but he never focused on how he could improve upon his job or performance. As we discussed the situation, he showed a great deal of insight into the problems at his place of employment. We developed the goal of being assertive and communicating about the problems he observed. Within weeks of a long discussion with his supervisor about his observations, he was promoted to a supervisory position.

Next week we'll continue her article on goal setting with "How Do you Develop Specific Goals?"